Literature jokes

Few jokes (sorry if they have already been used).

1 I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.

2 Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn? Because he always has a great fall.

3 Have you heard the one about the skunk? Never mind, it really stinks.

4 It's always windy in a sports arena. All those fans.

5 What is the best day to go to the beach? Sunday, of course!

6 Comic Sans walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your type here."

7 What's the easiest way to get straight As? Use a ruler.

8 Why were they called the Dark Ages? Because there were lots of knights.

I was reading a book about gravity. It was so hard to put down!

Once I read a book about glue.

I couldn't put it down.

Why was the math book sad?

Because it had too many PROBLEMS and not enough RAP.

Roses are red, violets are blue.

Is that what you think? You have no clue, you fool!

What’s a kind midget’s favorite type of joke? Short and sweet.

"Warning, all unsaved progress will be lost." - Sun Tzu, The Art Of War.

"Why is Peter Pan always flying?"

"He never lands."

Your Mom's Favorite Book, Chapter 1: How To Cook.

Annabeth: "Percy, whaters up with you?"

What do you call a teen wizard who just went through puberty?

Hairy Potter.

Roses are red,

I am dead.

You could call me wet, or I will keep your dread.

What did a bee who was interested in philosophy say?

"To bee or not to bee."

Harry Potter is now Harry Orphan.

Knock knock.

Who's there?

Stephen.

Can't you read? It says "No Hawking."

— Can I borrow a book [on] how to kill myself?

— Librarian: No, because you won’t bring it back.

What do you call a flying pig?

Fiction.

"Bippity Bobbity Boo, Boo Radley is coming for you!"

A man walks into a library and asks for books about paranoia.

The librarian whispers, "They're right behind you!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Like petals in the wind, My heart dances for you.