Law jokes
What did the cop say to the muslim breaking the law?
"That's against th-Allah (read like da-law)."
Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 was a unregistered six offender.
What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?
You don’t need consent.
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
So a lady was walking down the street with two bags, and one of the bags was leaking $100 bills. A cop pulls up and he says, “Ma’am, ma’am, your bag is leaking hundred dollar bills.” Then she says, “Oh, thank you. I wonder how long that’s been going on.” And the cop says, “Before I help you, may I ask why your bag is leaking $100 bills?” And the lady says, “OK, I’ll tell you. So I live next to a stadium, and I have this beautiful rose garden, but these dumb teenagers always try and pee on the rosebushes. So they stick their junk through the fence, and I grab their junk. I said, ‘$100 dollars or it’s coming off.’” The cop says, “Oh, OK, well what’s the other bag for?” And she says, “Well, not all of them want to give me $100.”
What does the pedophile use for bait? Trix!
What kind of file do you need to turn a 15 mm hole into a 40 mm hole? A pedophile.
Space therapist in between the e and the r.
The rapists!
Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.
What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws?
Outlaws are wanted :)
So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?
So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."
What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?
Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.
You can hit an orphan, because who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
How did the man in prison escape?
He drew a bum on the wall and slid through the crack.
What’s the difference between a police man and a bullet?
At least when a bullet kills someone, it’s actually fired.
What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?
They get set free.
Why was the duck arrested?
Because it was caught selling quack.
Why are all orphans criminals?
Because they want to know what it's like to be wanted.
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 was a registered sex offender.