Law jokes

I was looking at our Human Services Minister and thinking I'm surprised he's married.

The things you do for your cousins!

My mom asked, "Why are you so depressed? It could be worse. You could be Tracy Latimer."

I replied, "I wish I were Tracy Latimer because then someone would kill me."

Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!

Why are orphans lucky?

Because when they drive, they don’t need a license plate, because they don’t have a home.

Have you ever been accused of a crime you didn't commit? Well, I have! I was wrongfully accused of larceny yesterday. I'm not smart enough for that, I just stole some stuff.

Why do orphans play GTA?

So they can get wanted.

Why did the wall fall over?

A drunk driver hit it going 90mph and died.

If you're ever bored, just slap an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

How do inmates keep in touch?

They have cell phones.

In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.

I mean, I don't see why not.

What does Christian say when he wants out of jail?

"Bale me out!"

Why can’t orphans order from Costa?

They need a parent or guardian with them.

Michael Vick is coming to town, hide your dogs!

A rapist, pedophile, and a priest walk into a bar.

He orders a beer.

My friend, Jackson Huge-T, got raped by Huge-D's.

I got raped when I was 5 in my princess pajamas by my dad. Nobody laughed at these jokes; they just cried.

7 little children gathered around the bed Bill Cosby's fantasy.

All he wants to do is tickle the kids, it's as plain as can be.

7 cellmates gathered around the bed ready to rape Bill Cosby instead.

What did the frog say to the pedophile?

Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.

"He scratched his face up, detective. That did it."

"Did I do that?"