Law jokes

Why are orphans lucky?

Because when they drive, they don’t need a license plate, because they don’t have a home.

I killed a homeless dude, now he's at funeral home 😭💔

What is Johnny Depp's new legal name?

Johnny in debt.

I tried kidnapping a kid today and told him I was his dad's friend and I would take him home. He just curled up into a ball and started crying. Kidnapping must be easy.

Me running from the principal because I put ten woman's rights books in the fictional section!

Why do orphans play GTA?

So they can get wanted.

If you're ever bored, just slap an orphan. What are they going to do, tell their parents?

Michael Vick is coming to town, hide your dogs!

Why can’t orphans order from Costa?

They need a parent or guardian with them.

What does Christian say when he wants out of jail?

"Bale me out!"

How do inmates keep in touch?

They have cell phones.

In the Middle Ages it was illegal for a blind man to become a king.

I mean, I don't see why not.

Why is it inappropriate when guys say their girlfriends are their “Partners in Crime”?

Like we get it, bro, she’s underage.

My friend, Jackson Huge-T, got raped by Huge-D's.

I got raped when I was 5 in my princess pajamas by my dad. Nobody laughed at these jokes; they just cried.

7 little children gathered around the bed Bill Cosby's fantasy.

All he wants to do is tickle the kids, it's as plain as can be.

7 cellmates gathered around the bed ready to rape Bill Cosby instead.

Why did your mum touch me? Because she was a pedo.

What did the frog say to the pedophile?

"He scratched his face up, detective. That did it."

"Did I do that?"

My grandfather has the heart of a lion!! 🦁

In a jar on his desk along with a lifetime ban from the zoo...