Law jokes
A police officer pulls a man over. "Hands in the air!"
The man said, "Okay."
Why did the chicken cross the road? To run from poachers.
Is it sexual harassment if a midget walks by you and tells you that your hair smells nice?
Me: If my face looked like yours, I would sue my parents.
Sensei: That’s funny, because when your parents dropped you off at the temple, they got a fine for littering.
Cop: Hehe, that’s funny because I gave them the fine!
My grandma has the heart of a lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo.
What does a sex offender that is a lesbian have in common with a sex offender that is a feminist?
They only performed cunnilingus on girls under 18 years old.
Why is it okay for a woman to use me when she feels like it, but when I use her body when I feel like it, I am the bad guy?
Why can't Michael Jackson play baseball?
He made a hit and run!
Why can't an orphan go to school?
They have no one to sign the parent signature.
So, a man walks past a gun store and sees all the guns are half price. Then the man says, "Wow, school supplies are low this week."
What happens to an orphan that gets on house arrest?
They get set free.
So, there is this button. There's a 50% chance you get a million dollars. There's a 50% chance that you turn into a turtle. Make them press the button, and if they give the money, you just push the orphan over, take their money, and run away because who are they going to tell? Their parents?
What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?
Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.
Why can't an orphan get caught on the hub? They have no parents to catch them.
What's the difference between outlaws and in-laws?
Outlaws are wanted :)
Why was the duck arrested?
Because it was caught selling quack.
You can hit an orphan, because who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
Why don't orphans care if they get in trouble? They can't call their parents.
Good that you got detention because you said that to me; you should've gone to jail.
Why couldn’t the underage orphan get on an adult-only website? Because you need your parents' consent.