Kid jokes
Walk up to an adopted kid and ask this, "How's your biological parents? Are they well?"
One day I told a kid what 2 x 12 was. He said he didn't know. I said let's go to my basement and figure it out. He is still in my basement trying to do the equation.
College is the opposite of kidnapping. They demand $100,000 from you, or they'll send your kid back.
Orphans and Chinese people can’t play baseball. The orphans can’t find home, and the Chinese kid will eat the bat.
Pussies and tits have one thing in common: they're both made for kids, but men end up licking or suckling them.
Yesterday I got detention because I said to the emo kid, "Come hang with us."
Q: What do you call an angry, bullied Asian kid?
Shoo Ting.
Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?
Kid: Why?
Man: 'Cause they have a family plan.
Kid: Oh, then I need to switch phone services then.
Man: Why?
Kid: I'm an orphan.
Man: *laughs out loud* That's tough!
(You can tell the joke shortened by saying, "Why can't an orphan use Verizon? 'Cause they have a family plan.")
Why was the rapper always late?
Because he had to drop his kids off at the Rhyme Bus.
I don't like them white, pale, always talking about death EMO kids!
Sorry, I meant CHEMO kids.
You'd think with Jason being a pastor's kid, his parents would have gotten him Invisalign.
And an exorcism.
I asked my friend, "Shouldn't we have 6 senses?"
He replied, "What is the 6th sense?"
"Common sense," I shot back while looking at the kid who was going to detention. "Never mind," I said.
What instrument does a special ed kid play? An autistic guitar.
What's a pedo's favorite snack?
Sour Patch Kids.
An orphan walked up to St. June's Family Hospital.
Doctor: "Sorry kid, you can't be in here."
The penis has a sad life. His hair is always a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor is an asshole, his best friend is a pussy, and his owner beats him.
He also stands up for kids who can't defend themselves.
I think someone left trash at the doorstep. Oh, wait, it's your parents dropping you off at the kid's store.
What's a game a paraplegic kid can't play?
Hopscotch.
The quiet kid, orphan, and school shooter walked into a bar, and he ordered a beer.
What did Osama get on his test when he was a kid? A 9/11.