Paraplegic jokes
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? -- The wheelchair.
They have a new line of socks for paraplegics.
They are so comfortable they can't even feel them.
I'm trying to come up with a set-up for an amputee joke, but I'm stumped.
"What did the blind, dumb, paraplegic, dead, eight-year-old child get for their birthday?"
"Cancer."
Aren't paraplegics just plegics that can fly?
What did the deaf, dumb, blind, paraplegic, autistic baby get for Christmas? AIDs.
What’s better than Stephen Hawking?
Stephen walking.
How do they execute paraplegics?
With the electric wheelchair.
Joke: I went to a paraplegic strip club the other day, the place was crawling with pussy.
Have you been to that paraplegic strip club? It's crawling with pussy!
What's black and sits at the top of the stairs?
A paraplegic after a house fire.
What do you call a paraplegic cannibal?
"Dine and dash."
What do you call a paraplegic stuck in a tower?
In trouble!
I met an amazing girl online. Smart, sexy... uninhibited.
Of course it turned out to be a 12 year old paraplegic boy... I have to admit... The sex was disappointing.
How does a blonde punish her blind son? She takes away his TV privileges.
How does a blonde punish her deaf son? She takes away his telephone privileges.
How does a blonde punish her paraplegic son? She gives him a spanking.
A paraplegic walks into a bar...
It's funny because he can't walk.
What’s better than winning gold at the Paralympics?
Walking.
What has 50 legs but can't walk?
25 disabled kids.
I can't stand being in a wheelchair.
I used to get pushed and called lazy in school.
Man, I loved that wheelchair.
I met a guy in a wheelchair today. His face was battered and bruised. "What happened to your face?" I asked.
"I'm a Paralympian," he replied.
"Boxing?"
"No, ... hurdles."