Kid jokes

Why don’t cannibal kids eat people with Down Syndrome? Because kids don’t like vegetables.

Who crashed the plane?

1. Abu Faram? - terrorist

2. The little kid Joseph?

3. The passed out pilot?

Or Jamal?

What do starving kids call Venetian blinds?

Bunk beds.

What's the difference between an emo kid and an onion?

You cry when you cut an onion.

My arse hole hurts like no joke, man. I just had to tell that your heads a peanut, you fucking nonce, kid, you fat fuck sack, your mum you dirty cow!

The Emo kid was late to his flight, so he needed to cut to the chase.

Fat kids are so fat, they have their own gravitational pull.

The school shooter: "I finally found you worthless crybabies!!"

The Quiet Kid: "How are a bag of chips and a mac11 the same?"

The school shooter: "I don't know."

The Quiet kid: "When you pull them out everybody wants to be your friend."

How do you help a depressed kid face their fears... You count to 3 and say jump?

The emo kid tried to high five the tree.

But the tree left him hanging.

What did the dad say to the kid?

Nothing, he went to get the milk.

What did the depressed kid do in P.E.? They played with the jump rope, but they used it the wrong way.

If an emo kid and the quiet kid had a fight, the quiet kid would win because the emo kid would cut himself to death.

Teacher: What's 55 flowers plus 67 flowers?

Kid: A garden?

Teacher: Did I tell you that you're adopted?

A kid asks his dad why his name is Experience. The dad says, "That's what we give our mistakes."

What do you call a kid with a special sense of humor? Autism, hahaha!

There was an emo kid in their room, boom, they're all gone, now.

You get a deep voice, you shit talk to 5 year olds.

So little Susie came home and said, "Mom, little Johnny showed me his pecker."

And her mom said, "WHAT?!"

And little Susie was like, "Yeah, it reminded me of a peanut." Her mom said, "Oh, because it was so small?"

Susie said, "No, because it tasted salty."

So, I was at a funeral the other day, and it was a school shooting mass funeral. The lady beside me asked me, “What do you think was going through their heads?” And I replied, “Probably a bullet.” She was furious and said, “How dare you! You have no idea what those kids were probably going through!” And I replied, “Well, they were going through anything the bullet was going through them.”