Kid jokes

When I saw your hairline, I thought I saw kid Jason Voorhees.

I saw one kid in a game. He went, "I love you, tree!" He was dumb as cant tell, sorry.

I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"

The Emo kid was late to his flight, so he needed to cut to the chase.

What does the dumb kid say to the blind kid?

"Long time no see!"

Me going to the principal's after telling the kid with a wheelchair to stand up for himself.

I know everything about Walt Disney! How he died, how his mom and dad died, how his kids died, when he was born, where he was born, and how he was born. 😏

Why do blind kids like plane crashes?

Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.

What am I gonna do on the 5th anniversary of the Parkland shooting?

Shoot a load in you just like I shot those kids ;)

I told an emo kid that we were going to hang (hangout), but they took it too literal.

A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."

The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"

What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!

What do you call a kid who sings well?

Melodic Minor.

There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”

"Addison, are you one of those kids who are very, very, very, very smart? Because you sound like one."

So a kid was hanging out with his mom and this man comes up to him and said, "Hi, I'm your new dad." The kid did not think about it, and then he did and said, "But I already have a dad." The mom said, "That was not your real dad."

"Ugly kid, I feel ugly."

"Me? You don't have feel ugly, you already ugly."

Ugly kid, people keep saying I'm ugly.

Me: They're certainly not wrong.

Kid in 2021: I'm goated at hide and seek.

Anne Frank: I am the hide and seek champion of the world.

Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.

The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.