Kid

Kid jokes

News

I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.

He never came back the next day, says the local news.

Gift

It’s Christmas and Sally has a gift. She got a Barrie. Just kidding, she still hasn’t opened it.

Robbery

Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.

The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.

Candace

Kid 1: Do you know Candace?

Kid 2: Candace who?

Kid 1: Candace dick fit in your mouth!

Memes

Idea

"Look at these kids stealing ideas, bro. They're going to jail."

Orphan

What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.

Burden

When I was a kid, my mother told me I could be anyone I wanted to be.

Turns out, I'm just a burden.

Orphan

Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.

Genie: You're now an orphan.

Orphanage

Some kid: Hey, did you know there's an orphanage down the street?!

Me: NO WAY! Wanna check it out?

Kid: NO, IT'S HAUNTED!!

Me: Haunted my ass, let's go!

Kid: Wait, isn't your house also haunted???

Me: Yea

School Shooter

Some weird kid came into school today with his tagging gun. He tagged my friend really good. At the end, he tagged 12 students and 1 teacher. VICTORY ROAYAL ✌

Hide-and-seek

Kid in 2021: I'm goated at hide and seek.

Anne Frank: I am the hide and seek champion of the world.

Difference

P1: What's the difference between a kid and a hooker?

P2: I don't know.

P1: Wow, you sick fuck!

Orphan

Why was the orphan kid bad at school? Because he wanted a phone call home.

Broccoli

What's the difference between boogers and broccoli?

Kids won't eat the broccoli.

Batman

Kid: I want to be like Batman.

Genie: I can make arrangements. The kid comes home, both of his parents are dead.

Genie: I told you.

Kid: .............................................