Kid jokes

There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”

Kid: I got homework.

Mom: Ok, so?

Kid: I got a F in my balls.

What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.

Me: Where's your mom?

Kid: [cries]

Me: [leaving from the adoption center]

Don't ever try to give an emo kid a high five. They'll just leave you hanging.

Hi! It's the kid with another dark joke! On this episode: Orphans!

Orphanage kid: You’re ugly!

Kid with mother: Your mom!

Kid at Wish: I wish I could be Batman.

Doctor: Okay, shoots mum and dad. Doctor: I guess now you’ll have to be gay, you wanted to be like Batman.

Roses are red, violets are blue, don't let your kids next to Prince Andrew.

My girlfriend told me that she wonders what our kids will look like.

No, they will be wondering what I look like.

I was cussing out this kid for stealing, and their mom walked in and said, "Hey, language!" I just said, "English, bitch!"

Dad: Are you gay?

Kid: Yes.

10 days later.

Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.

Dad: I thought you were gay?

Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.

Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.

When I saw your hairline, I thought I saw kid Jason Voorhees.

I saw one kid in a game. He went, "I love you, tree!" He was dumb as cant tell, sorry.

What do you call an emo kid standing outside the mall?

Anything, he'll cry no matter what you say.

I got a GTR yesterday, now my kids say, "GTR we there yet?"

What was Helen Keller's favorite game when she was a kid?

I spy.

Random Kid: Aye man where was Kobe flying to?

Launch Site: Umm, he might have gone too close to here, sorry if he might have crashed...

For all those Simpsons fans out there, this one I'm sure you know:

Abe: "It's rotten being old. No one listens to you."

Lisa: "It's awful being a kid. No one listens to you."

Homer: "I'm a white male, aged 18-49. Everyone listens to me--no matter how dumb my suggestions are."

Why did the kid get grounded? Because he was always lion.