Kid jokes
I told a crying kid to wipe his tears and come back smiling.
He never came back the next day, says the local news.
I told an emo kid that we were going to hang (hangout), but they took it too literal.
What do you call a kid who sings well?
Melodic Minor.
There was a kid and a historian in a museum about WW2 and were looking at Hitler in a car doing the Nazi salute. The kid said, “Why is he putting his arm in the air?” The historian said, “Indicators on cars didn’t exist back then so he’s probably saying take the Third Reich!”
A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid."
The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what?"
Memes
What does the school shooter do after he shoots a victim? He shoots more kids in them!
I was at the park the other day and sat down on the bench next to a mum and her daughter, and she asked which one was my kid, and I said I haven't decided yet.
Why is there a middle school?
Because the kids that go there are middle class families.
"Look at these kids stealing ideas, bro. They're going to jail."
Kid finds genie lamp, wishes to be Batman.
Genie: You're now an orphan.
What is the difference between a tall kid and an orphan? One is tall enough that their parents can see them.
Who robs and breaks into people's houses?
"Addison, are you one of those kids who are very, very, very, very smart? Because you sound like one."
Kid 1: Do you know Candace?
Kid 2: Candace who?
Kid 1: Candace dick fit in your mouth!
Two kids told their parents they saw a man late at night entering their house on Christmas night.
The day later, they found out several houses were robbed.
Have you met Bofa?
Bofa deez blind kids!
Why did the kid get grounded? Because he was always lion.
Why does the emo kid skip class?
There was a kid sitting in a corner.
Me: "Hey! Why are you here at an orphanage?"
Orphan: "..."
Me: "Oh, wait, you're an orphan."
If the sun had a kid, it would be like father, like sun. 🤓 😎