Joke jokes
What's the difference between me and cancer?
My father didn’t beat cancer.
Wanna hear a joke?
Woman's rights.
What kind of file turns a 5mm hole into a 3cm hole?
A pedo-file.
Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. “Ye gads, matey,” says Morty. “What happened to ya?” Sol says, “Me pirate ship was attacked, and a lucky shot lopped off me leg. So now I got me a wooden peg.”
“And yer hand?” asks Marty.
“When me ship sank, a shark bit me hand off. So now I got me a hook.”
“OK, but what’s with the eye patch?”
“I was standin’ on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye.”
“But ya don’t go blind from no seagull poop.”
“True,” says Sol. “But it was me first day with the hook.”
Funny jokes are like kids with autism.
They have special needs to make them.
What do you call a vagina with multiple clits?
A tongue workout!
Why did the toilet paper cross the road?
To wipe the chicken's ass!
What's the most between my uncle and aunt?
My aunt waited until I was 14 to come on my face.
Scrolled through all of them, still haven't laughed.
Why did the two balls cross the road?
To get to the penis!
Sorry, too rude?
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.
So my friend and I went camping at a Cold Lake Campground and he jumped into it without any warning, and so I asked him, "Wat-er you doing?"
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What’s big, red, and eats rocks?
A big, red, rock eater.
Wanna hear a joke?
This site.
VOTING QUARTERFINAL 1: LIKE: When the school shooter is about to leave your classroom and the autistic kid's sketchers light up.
DISLIKE: When the school shooter finds you and you think you're gonna die, but he remembers the time you gave him a pen. 🖌
Vote for the better joke!
Shorkey will find you in bed tonight, and he will eat you like my joke or else...
A guy on a bus saw a beautiful girl. He asked for her number, and of course, she said no. He asked the bus driver for advice, and he said, "That girl goes to the cemetery to pray every day at 10 p.m. and look for a statue of an angel." So he dresses up as God, goes to the grave, and she sees him. She says, "Oh, Lord, end my misery! Kill me now!" And he said, "Only if you do something for me first." She replied, "What is it, oh mighty Lord?" He said, "Have sex with me." She agreed. They had sex, and when she was done sucking his dick, he said, "I have something to tell you." He took off his costume and said, "I'm the guy from the bus." And she took off her costume: "I'm the bus driver."
(Does anyone remember this? It's an old joke someone made, or does no one remember this? I didn't make this, but it went smth like this)
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
What is the difference between a retard and a zombie anyway?
They’re always hungry and shuffle around aimlessly, moaning... Oh, and it takes a bullet in the forehead to put them both down.
Uh!!!