Humor
You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.
Jokes about the Twin Towers and planes usually crash and burn.
Why’d the chicken cross the road?
To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!
“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”
I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.
So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
Memes
Welcome to Joe's abortion clinic! No fetus can beat us! You make 'em, we take 'em!
When I saw you, it instantly made me cry. LOL.
How many balls do you have on your body?
2. Your butt.
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.
This is true. Today I was at the mall and there was a guy holding a sign that said, "Need money for strippers and weed."
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange ya glad this isn't another stupid orphan joke that has been posted 10 times before!
(insert funny joke about a dick here).
Did you laugh? Be honest.
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
So last week I gave my blind friend a cheese grater. The next two weeks he told me that was the most violent book he has ever read.
Why are there only 363 days on an orphan's calendar?
They don't have Father's Day and Mother's Day.
Gf: Babe, do you love me?
Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.
Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...
Bf: Exactly.
Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.
Why were there two boys on the bay?
Because they were gay!
Why does an orphan only have a Samsung? Because it doesn't have a home button!
When Knife tells Annoying Orange, "I'm trying something new," Annoying Orange said, "Oh no, are you having a midknife crisis?" and then Annoying Orange laughs.