Humor
Why do emos cut themselves?
To play noughts and crosses.
What is the thirstiest ocean in the world?
The Gulf of Mexico lol!
How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You Poker Face.
It's punny.
Do you like tree jokes? Because they leaf me in tears! :3
Memes
Oh no Oh no oh no no no no wait wait wait
Stephen Hawking went on a date last night.
She left after 15 minutes, complaining she didn't like his tone.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Wakanda? Wakanda who? WAKANDA ENDING IS THIS?
A man from Brooklyn is arguing with an Englishman. He says things like,
"It's an elevator, not a lift!"
and
"It's a bathroom! Not 'washroom'!"
He keeps going on until the Englishman says,
"Hey wanker, it's a school, not a god damned shooting range."
Why did the man die of the actor's performance?
The performance was unbeLIVEable!
What do you call a PEIS?
Yo mama so fat it took Nationwide three years to get on her good side.
"What's 9 + 10?"
"21" (lol XD)
Also:
"My name Jeff" (Roar XD)
One more thing:
Ninja has ligma.
What's Stephen Hawking's other favorite song?
Steve Winwood's "Just Roll with It Baby."
Who tells the best chicken jokes?
Comedi-hens!
What does the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, something smells!
I once asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite... He said, "NaBrO."
What separates snowmen from snow-women?
Snow balls.
My god, my egg jokes are eggcellent!
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."