Humor
What's the difference between an orphan and a corpse?
One of them has someone to mourn them.
Why do orphans not like July 24th??
Because it's Parents Day.
You're so tall you can go see God, but you're so tall your balls got small.
It's really great that you can make fun of orphans, 'cause what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
Who tells the best chicken jokes?
Comedi-hens!
What does the right eye say to the left eye?
Between you and me, something smells!
A girl named Ranch went to the store and stayed there. Why? Because she was ranched!
I got pranked so many times. Once I saw two wheels rolling down the street. I heard this noise. I looked behind me. There's a legless man in a wheelless chair screaming, "HELP! I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE!" but I walked away. I knew it was a prank.
Why did the man sit on his porch and bark at the postman when he came?
Because his dog had a sore throat!
Whoever invented the knock-knock joke should get a "no bell" prize.
My god, my egg jokes are eggcellent!
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."
I still remember my granddad's last words,
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
What separates snowmen from snow-women?
Snow balls.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
A cow with no front legs walking around?
Beef stroganoff.
What did the banana say to the vibrator?
"What are you shaking for? She’s going to eat me!"
What's the difference between your dad and the mailman? Nothing.
So.. err actually, don’t worry. I was gonna make a joke about dead babies, but I had to abort.
Why are these jokes bad?
They're literally the worst jokes ever.
Why can't you run through a campground?
Because it's "past tents!"