Humor
When someone calls you gay, say:
"I'm straight, straighter than your hairline!"
What’s long, white, and full of cream? A cheese stick.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. (Wing, wing, halo.)
If your boyfriend doesn't get your fruit puns, you got to let that mango.
What do you call nitrogen in the day? You call it day-trogen!
Why did the researchers want all the shore birds high on marijuana?
They wanted to leave no tern unstoned.
Why can’t October fool April?
Because only April fools.
What did the duck eat for lunch?
Soup and quackers.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because he wasn't peeling very well!
First human comes.
Sans: That was pun intended.
What did the father name his daughter with no legs?
Peggy.
Your forehead is so big, Megamind thought he was your long lost sibling.
If you think long and hard, oral sex is like cannibals.
Jokes about the poor aren't rich.
My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"
The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."
A kid went to visit his bully, and he says, "How's your face?" The kid says, "How's your parents?" and proceeds to walk out of the orphanage.
"Dude come here and see a rabbit!"
"Ok!"
"Are you ok, man?"
"Yeah, I’m fine."
"Dude, pull your pants back up!"
When someone said to an orphan, "My boyfriend ghosted me," the orphan says back, "Don't worry, my parents ghosted me!" 🤣
When does a joke become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent!
I am a fat girl.