Humor
My only friend who actually cares: "Stop making suicide jokes, I’m really concerned!"
Me: Okay, I’ll cut it out.
"You have to be more patient!" "Will it take a long time?"
What do dark humor and a person with scoliosis have in common?
Both are sick and twisted.
Yo mama so fat, when she took a picture of herself, her phone ran out of storage.
What's the difference between a joke and the Twin Towers? People don't laugh at my jokes.
Memes
I wish all stop signs were written this way
Actually, Iron Man is female.
Israel and Palestine jokes are hard at these times.
It’s all about execution.
What do you call lesbian sex during their period?
A blood transfusion.
I love all races, even the bad ones.
What do you call a gay drive-by?
A fruit roll up.
What's the difference between a priest and a pimple?
A pimple will wait until you're 12 years old to come on your face.
Used to laugh at Michael Jackson for wearing gloves and a mask...
Yet here I am, stuck at home in this COVID-19 "Thriller," beating it...
Would masturbating while smoking weed be considered masturblazing, weedwhacking, or highjacking?
What's the difference between sex and mental illness?
Most of Reddit has experienced mental illness.
Did you hear about the dyslexic American police officer?
He shot a Ginger.
Yo momma is so ugly, she made my Happy Meal cry.
A guy and girl had a sex poem competition.
Guy: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I can put mine in yours, but you can't put yours in mine."
Girl: "Two times two is four, four plus five is nine. I know the length of yours, but you won't know the depth of mine."
What separates bad jokes from dad jokes?
Condoms.
I started a new job. My boss said, "Hi, my name is Rebecca, but people call me Becky." I said, "My name is Kyle, but people call me Dick."
She said, "How do you get Dick from Kyle?" I replied, "You just ask nicely."
What was Hitler’s favorite sex position?
Sixty nein.