Humor
Doin (DYM 35).
I called the Chinese takeaway yesterday. A man picked up the phone and said: "Hello! I am Wan Kin, the chef." I said that I'll come back later.
Roses are red.
I have free candy. Get in my van. I have free candy!
A girl asked, "Can I have some nuts too?"
Boy: "Sure, what ones ;)"
What do you call 2 homeless people throwing rocks at each other? "Pillow Fight!"
What do U.S. airstrikes and dark humor have in common?
They're normally pointed towards Africa and the Middle East.
A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."
What is big, black, and hairy? It's a gorilla with a machine gun.
Stop! Stop the orphan jokers!
What does an orphan and a banana have in common? They both get split up.
"Gaining weight is gonna be a piece of cake."
Two friends are talking and one says, "I had a good day today, I ran into my ex." The other guy replies, "How is that good?" The friend says, "I was in my car."
What happens when you make an asían girl squirt?
She charges you 10 cents for extra sauce.
What do you say to your customer at a popsicle stand when he asks for the price?
Dollar a pop!
Get it?
For all the people with Covid-19, I just want to say... Stay positive.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair coming out of a building on fire? Hot wheels.
Orphan jokes are funny to explore, especially with the family.
Your forehead is so clear, like the Liberty Bell manual in 1876.
Now you should let your imagination work... imagine naked Jesus with an erection... and nail holes in his hands...
Little Johnny and his dad were going to buy a horse.
Dad: Rubbing on the horse’s chest and butt.
Little Johnny: What are you doing?
Dad: Checking to see if the horse is healthy so I can buy it.
Little Johnny: Oh well, I think the mall man wants to buy mom.