Orphan jokes
Emo jokes
Priest jokes
Hairline jokes
Depression jokesA vampire walks into a bar and orders a cup of hot water. The bartender asks, "I thought you guys only drink blood?"
The vampire pulls out a used tampon and says, "I'm making tea."
Vampire Jokes
I tried to get my bloood sucked by a vampire, but he said I was too empty inside
what did one lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? same time next month?
A Vampire goes to the Bakery:
Vampire🧛♂️: „One Bun please.“
Bäcker👩🍳: „But you're Vampire, don't you need blood 🩸 ?“
Vampir🧛♂️: „Yes, there is an accident outside and i need something to dip“
3 vampires walk into a bar. The first one orders a Bloody Mary. The second orders a Bloody Mary. The bartender turns to the third and asks “a Bloody Mary?”
The vampire shakes his head. “Hot water for me”
“Hot water?”
“I found a tampon out back and want to make tea”
What is a vampire’s favourite fruit?
A nectarine
Q:how can you tell if a vampire is sick
A:By how much hes coffin
A Vampire Stalks you into a field of corn, The stakes have never been higher...
What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman
Frostbite
me: *stabs vampire*
wife: omg
me: *beats vampire to death*
wife: OMG
me: what
wife: ur supposed to give them candy
me: well thats a sticky situation now isnt it barbara
Mommy mommy! Are we Vampires? Shut up and drink your soup before it clots.
What do you call vampire Matt Damon? Bat Damon!
I killed 5 zombies and stabbed a vampire with a steak and then I started to wonder why they were carrying bags of candy.
What do lesbian vampires say after sex?
"See you next month."
what's a vampires favourite fruit? a neck-tarine
What does a lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? "Same time next month?"
Why did the Vampire put his son up for adoption? He thought his son sucked.
What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire?……. Frostbite.