Cow

6 views ·

A farmer artificially impregnated a cow. The cow said to another cow, "It's a miracle, I'm pregnant." The other cow said, "That's impossible, it's only us cows in the field, you must be joking." The first cow said, "Nope, I'm serious... no bull!"

Orphan

2 views ·

These orphan jokes are getting old. I mean, seriously, haven't you got something better to tell?

Farmer

15 views ·

A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."

Blonde

16 views ·

If a blonde and a brunette jump off a building, who would hit the ground first?

The brunette, because the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions!

Nun

74 views ·

What do you get when you put 2 nuns and a blond on a football field? 2 tight ends and a wide receiver.

Baby

18 views ·

I made a joke about putting babies in the microwave and got told I was a disgusting person.

So from now on I’ll only make baby in the deep fryer jokes.

Wendy

17 views ·

"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."

Apple

8 views ·

Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"

Friend: "I don't know."

Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.