Humor
Q: What does your Mama and a slinky have in common?
A: They aren't much to look at, but you can't help cracking a smile when you see it tumbling down the stairs.
They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?
In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣
What do you call sweaty titties?
Humititties.
If you don't like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON'T ACCEPT YOU HERE!
If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at? And if they cry, just say, "hey here are your parents" then grab nothing. Perfect example.
Have you heard about the guy whose friends teased him because he pays for sex? He doesn't pay anymore.
Me: Do you like smash?
Friend: Smash Rolls?
Me: No, Smash DEEZ NUTS!
Friend: AHHHHH (*moans)
I punched an orphan and told him to go back to his parents and tell them about it... Oh, wait.
What did the guy tired of hearing people joke about rape do?
He killed everyone on this f#cking website.
Q. What's a disabled person's favorite band?
A. System of a Down's syndrome.
Bro, I'm so gay I can't even spell straight.
What's the difference between Autism and Gender?
Autism is on a spectrum.
Did you hear about the cannibal who converted to Catholicism?
On Fridays, he only eats fishermen!
Why do poor people eat insects?
Because they're locust!
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
You know if you poo on the toilet at 11:59 PM...
Then at 12:01 AM, it's just the same shit, different day...
Whenever I have diarrhea, my roommate gets constipated.
When I told him this, he said, "Are you kidding me?"
I said, "I shit you not."
What is the difference between anal sex and a microwave? A microwave doesn't brown your meat.
What’s the last thing Tickle Me Elmo receives before leaving the factory?
Two test tickles.
Your hairline is still missing, even Dora can’t explore it!