Humor
Why’d the chicken cross the road?
To get choked and stroked by Mr. Big Bloke!
“We’ll choke and stroke, it ain’t no joke!”
"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
If two eagles make a baby and two sparrows make a baby, what makes no baby?
Two swallows.
What do Africans eat for breakfast?
E-bola Cornflakes.
Yo mama so slow, she took nine months to make the joke. Thank god mine only took 6.
Your hairline and my car go Lighting McQueen speed because he never came back with the milk.
HAHAHAH! You all got April fooled in the wrong month!
Me: "What's the difference between an apple and an emo?"
Friend: "I don't know."
Me: An apple actually falls from the tree.
There are "nun" good jokes.
Why can't a dodo fly? Cus it suicided when it saw you will be born soon.
if priests were on Twitter, they would tweet, "He's a 10 but he's 10."
Abigail Brynn Welch is not funny.
What show do gay men watch?
"2 and a Half Men!"
Lol at this one fellas!
My mom bought me a car, and she called me an ungrateful b*tch because I sat in my wheelchair the whole time.
Why did the sperm cross the road?
Because I put the wrong socks on this morning.
What game can an emo play on their wrists without an ink pen?
Tic-tac-toe.
The biggest inconvenience in 2001, I thought, was my brother. Turns out it was 9/11. I guess the planes saw him be born and died from how ugly he was. Aluh aluckbar.
Goofy ahh jokes below.
Last week I felt so high and mighty I thought I could fly. I took one shot, puffed through my pipe, and jumped in the air on a trampoline. I woke up in heaven.
I asked an angel, "How did I die?"
"Well, little monkey, you thought your bed was a trampoline and you hit your head. Your mom called the doctor, and the doctor said you were dead."
I was going to share my joke about anal, but, fuck it, it was inappropriate.