Swallow

Swallow Jokes

An Irishman, Englishman and Scotsman go into a pub and each order a pint of Guinness. Just as the bartender hands them over, three flies buzz down and one lands in each of the pints. The Englishman looks disgusted, pushes his pint away and demands another pint. The Scotsman picks out the fly, shrugs, and takes a long swallow. The Irishman reaches in to the glass, pinches the fly between his fingers and shakes him while yelling, "Spit it out, ya bastard! Spit it out!"

3

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because it was a very large mammal, its throat was very small. The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to Heaven, I will ask Jonah."

The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to Hell?"

The little girl replied, "Then you ask him."

My uncle and I have some what of an awkward relationship. At times I find him a bit hard to swallow.

How can you tell if you have a high sperm count?

When your girlfriend has to chew before she swallows.

2

Billy: *spits out food*

Mom: BILLY! We swallow what we have in our mouths.

Dad: *looks at mom*

Mom: Shut up

If you get you get it

Who is the biggest slut in the world ms.pacman because you give her 25 cents and she swallows balls until she dies

Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch? He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.

one day i was just sitting around when my butthole began to grow larger it grew and grew and began to engulf the other parts of my body until it swallowed them all now i am just a big butthole typing this please help me

what did the man say when he swallowed a clock and tried to go to the bathroom? WATCH OUT!!!