Human jokes
What do you call a tall person?
A tall person.
Papyrus was playing with the human, but then Papyrus fell and he broke the cell bone of the human.
WOULD YOU RATHER:
Eat 20 lbs of cow s**t?
or
Drink a gallon of sperm?
What do sharks and people have in common? The great ones are white.
What do you call an emo kid with light-up shoes? A human chandelier.
If Batman is half bat and half human, how was he made?
"He wasn't because you can't f*ck a bat."
Yo mama's so fat that Jane Goodall couldn't tell if she was a chimpanzee or a human being.
Why doesn't Voldemort have a human nose?
Because his snake bit it off!
What do fire and people have in common?
They will both eventually die out.
How do you get a woman to give head? Force it down her throat and hold the back of her head. Make her gag for a little and then pull out. Do this over and over for 30 seconds or so. If she doesn't open up, choke her and force her mouth open.
Woman aren't human anyways... lol.
Why did the butt let out a fart?
Answer: To wipe out humanity!
What's the difference between a cat and a human? About 500 bullets.
What do you call a little boy with no arms and no legs?
Names.
What do you call gun ammunition made out of human babies?
Project-childs.
(Projectiles)
Our Human Services Minister is just mad because his wife cheated on him 20 years ago.
With their brother.
I pray to a dead human I hope to be reunited with.
Jesus, that's sick.
Your forehead is like a line, it just keeps going.
Why do humans hate aliens?
Because Fortnite took them out of the game, and I want aliens back in Fortnite!
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
You know what is the worst mistake every human being made?
Answer: Living.