History jokes
Yo mama so old, I bet she was born when dinosaurs were made, and also she killed them with they breath! ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
I invented a time-traveling machine and traveled back to Pangea. I warned the dinosaurs about the deadly asteroid. They told me, "It wasn't an asteroid... it was Pionel Pessi's penalty ball ricocheted from Mars that made them extinct." Tears ran down my face. Shame on you, Pessi!
I heard World War 500000 in my parents'.
What was purple and conquered the world?
Alexander The Grape.
What's the difference between the baby I just killed and Isaac Newton?
Isaac Newton died a virgin.
Memes
Shitpost-master general
What do my baby and dinosaurs have in common? They are both dead.
What happened when Obama ran for president?
The whole US thought, "Holy hell, it's Osama bin Laden!" Thought he was dead.
Why do white people carry Confederate flags?
To remind us that they are losers.
Question: What's brown and sitting on the piano bench?
Answer: Beethoven's last movement.
Jesus walked, so Mohammad can fly.
Russians think they are tougher than Americans. Here are some reasons for the Russians out here reading this:
1. USA was NEVER invaded!
2. USA never commits as many war crimes as Russia does!
3. USA made the first nuclear weapon so yeah shove that up your ass, Russians!
4. Our soldiers don’t rape kids.
5. We have more allies than you.
6. We are smaller but stronger.
7. Random civilians in the USA have stronger guns than Russian military does!
Why was 10 so scared? Because he was in the middle of 9/11.
Are you the Twin Towers?
Because I want to smash you.
How could the German people fall for Hitler and the Nazis?
There were an awful lot of red flags!
What did Jeff Dahmer say to the gays? Get over here and let me give you so much anal to where you die, DADDY! UWU!
Why are 9/11 victims the fastest readers in the world?
Because they went through 90 stories in just 10 seconds!
My dad killed himself because he was Hitler.
How do you think Julius Caesar killed his enemies?..
With a pair of Caesars! 😂😂👌
What happens when a sink on the Titanic overflows?
It sinks it.
Why did Hellen hate when her dad yelled at her?
Oh wait, she didn’t know! 🤣🤣