Health jokes
Right, I have a dog and his name is Syndrome, and whenever he is good, I go "Good Syndrome," but whenever he is naughty, I go "Down Syndrome."
I saw a disabled person in the super market. They were at the vegetable aisle.
What's the difference between me and cancer?
My dad didn't beat cancer.
What do you get if you talk to a Down syndrome person face to face at close distance?
Soaked...
What do you call an epileptic kid on cocaine?
An earthquake.
What do you call an Asian in a wheelchair? Sum Ting Wong.
Why do pedos hate corona? Because they have to stay two meters away from children. 😈
What happens when you have a kid with Tourette's and a hair trigger?
The Las Vegas shooting.
When I went to the doctor, he pulled his wife in and said, "What do you see?"
I replied, "A fat bitch." He said, "Ok, your eyesight is perfect."
What’s the difference between a tire and three-hundred-sixty-five used condoms?
One’s a good year; the other’s a great year!
What do you call a hospital that's flooded with vegetable soup?
Last time Kenny ate a vegetable, he got banned from his mom's nursing home.
Your mama so fat that when she went to McDonald's, they said, "Sorry, you've had enough, ma'am."
What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest?
You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid until he’s 13 years old.
Stephen Hawking had pins and needles and got told to walk it off.
Guess what I got from my uncle this Christmas? Herpes.
What’s the hardest thing to eat on a vegetable? The wheelchair.
This guy in a trench coat walks up to a kid, opens the trench coat and has glasses inside.
He says to the kid, “Hey kid, want some extra-see?”
Yo mama's so fat that she used a telephone pole as a tampon.
What's red, six inches long, and made my girlfriend cry when I fed it to her?
Her miscarriage.