Nursing Home

Nursing Home Jokes

Vegetable

Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.

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  • Incest

    So I heard Kenny's mom got moved to a nursing home.

    He'll probably leave her alone now.

    He doesn't eat vegetables.

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  • Vegetable

    What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?

    Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.

    Dog

    Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?

    Paul Walker

    Did you hear that nursing homes keep returning the new Paul Walkers?

    They let the elderly move fast, but then burst into flames and burn the patients alive.