Health jokes
What do you call an appetite including apples? Appletite.
Yo momma so stupid that someone said, "You're not that wealthy," and she went to a doctor.
Why did the vampire go to the doctor?
Because of his coffin.
Why do people eat bananas? Because it's appealing!
Guy goes to the doctor. The doctor says, "You look run down." The guy says, "No, I've come on my bike!"
A man lost his left arm.
He's all right now.
So if I drink alcohol, you're an alcoholic. But if I drink Fanta, I’m fantastic.
Baal jharne ke upay?
What song is sung when conceiving?
"Let's Get Physical, Physical!"
What did the doctor say to the potato?
It told it it had tuberculosis.
Who's climbing the tree?..... Not Sarah.
Who is in hospital?.... Sarah.
What’s Stephen Hawkins favourite shampoo and conditioner?
Head and shoulders.
Where are fart bombs made?
Old people's arses!
I know a little girl who once had an accident. When I asked her what her favorite song was, she responded with "🎶Head, shoulders, wheels, and frame! Wheels and frame!🎶"
An apple walked into the clinic.
The doctor asked what his favorite color was.
The apple said "red." :)
For a while, lead was used in pencils, but... we realised that it might not have been the smartest idea because it lead (badoom ching) to some people getting lead poisoning.
I was falling down the stairs at my local clock tower.
I somehow broke more than 206. I broke 342!
We recently found out my grandpa is addicted to Viagra.
No one is taking it harder than grandpa.
How are infants and chocolate alike? They'll both kill your dog.
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.