Health jokes
It's still depression, by the way.
Why are you sitting down to pee? I don't have a good back and can't lift something big.
A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"
I love telling good news to my patients, like they survived the crash but their family died.
Do not ever make fun of people who look like they have no necks. They are fully protected from vampires.
Memes
Doctor: “You’ll be at peace soon.”
Man: “Am I dying?”
Doctor: “No, your wife is.”
Yo mama so vegetarian that she loves the Vegan Teacher!
Cancer is like your dad. It only comes back when Blueface baby drops a new album.
Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Vaseline
AUGH, oh sorry, I just got a third ball because of girls hitting my balls with a handball!
"Cancer gives you weed. It’s not healthy."
You know who else has dementia?
Comments for answer.
Doctor: Congratulations!!!
Woman: Was it a successful delivery?
Doctor: No, it’s DiGiorno!
What's worse than having a comedian as president? Having a president that has dementia.
Fat.
Yo mama went to Safeway to be safe.
Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn't "peeling" well!
What time do Chinese people go to the dentist?
Tooth hurty (2:30).
If you have a broken bone, do you have broken skin?