Health

Health jokes

Muscle

Face-Timing My Girlfriend:

"Hey girl! Are you a veterinarian? Because these puppies are sick!" *shows muscle*

Priest

What's the difference between acne and a Catholic priest?

Acne doesn't cum on a kid's face 'til they're 13 or 14.

Memes

Abuse

My wife said she wanted to leave me. She said it’s because of the abuse, but really, she’s the one abusing herself by drinking alcohol and got poisoning the next day. This shows almost half of the woman’s population is weak both physically and mentally.

Kid

What do you call an autistic kid if he was short?

A short tistic.

Surgery

Patient: Sorry I'm so nervous, this is my first surgery.

Doctor: Oh, don't worry, mine too!

Cow

Why did the cow cross the road? Because the chicken had corona.

Forehead

There was a doctor's room filled with 20 women, 4 kids, 15 men, and 1 dog. However, there were forty foreheads. How is this possible?

(They will think 44 heads, not 40 foreheads.)

Because there are 40 foreheads, not 44 heads.

Peanut

So I was in the lunch room and was sitting by the peanut allergic kids' table. I stood up and I threw an opened bag of peanuts at them and yelled, "25 kill streak!" 🤣😂

Pharmacy

Why does Africa have no pharmacies? Because you can't have medicine on an empty stomach.

Food

A: Do you eat food?

B: Yes...

A: You can sit on deez nuts then!

B: Omg I have depression now.