HIV jokes
Me: spreading positivity.
Everyone else at the HIV testing center.
What’s positive in Africa?
HIV/AIDS.
My mom told me to be positive...
I was heading to an HIV test.
People say rape is bad. It is because I don't want STD and HIV.
My happiest moment in life was getting a positive grade on my H.I.V. test without studying.
What’s the only positive thing about Freddie Mercury’s death?
The HIV test results.
A guy with AIDS went into the doctor's room unusually happy. You could even say he was HIV positive.
Ads for meds be like: Chloroform, it's Chloroform, helps with itchy eyes. Side affects may include Acute Flaccid Myelitis (AFM), AIDS (HIV/AIDS), Alphaviruses, Alzheimer's Disease, Alzheimer's Diseases (Spanish), Arboviral Encephalitis, Arthritis, Babesiois, Cancer, Unintentional injuries, Chronic lower respiratory disease, Stroke and cerebrovascular diseases, Alzheimer's disease, Diabetes, Influenza and pneumonia.
My boss doctor said that we are getting a surgeon coming in tomorrow. I'm super excited to work with him. The next day, we had to do our first-ever open heart surgery, so me and the surgeon spent many hours on this patient. We finished the surgery and went outside for a smoke, and we were talking. I said, "Why did you keep the patient's blood on your glove?"
He replied, "We in my free time I test it for anything diseases, HIV." The next day, I got invited to his house, and we had some drinks. I said, "This is amazing red tea. What is in it?" Just the 2000 people you have cut open.
Aaron and Ben meet on Grindr. They have a drink and have sex. They wake up in the morning in bed. Aaron says, "I'm so glad I got it out." Ben replies, "What? Oh, just the HIV."
A blonde went to an HIV test. When she came back, she said, “The doctors say that I’m all positive!”
True story: In 1986, in the midst of the HIV epidemic, they made condoms available to the public. At that time, me and my boyfriend were 13 years old. My boyfriend was so happy: "These will make great water balloons!" And I was even happier. I did not have to pack a lunch for school tomorrow, lol.
I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.
