Health jokes
A handicapped person and an orphan get into a fight. The orphan says, "At least I have two functional legs." The handicapped person says, "At least I have two functional parents."
Yo mama is so stupid that she studied for a COVID test.
Your mum is so fat that when she sat on the toilet, she couldn't because her fat ass can't fit on the toilet seat.
Someone was bullying Stephen, so I said, "Why do you not stand up for yourself?"
I asked Stephen if he was an organ donor, and he said why.
I said, "That's a shame. I need parts for my go-cart."
Memes
Did you hear they just took Biden to the hospital?
No, what happened?
He couldn’t stop pootin!
Zion's so fat, when he walks, he breaks his mama's back.
Your mum is so fat, she eats every meal from KFC, Maccas, Hungry Jacks all at once!
My BALLS itched when I crashed the plane.
A book went to the doctor’s office and said: “Doctor, doctor, I’ve got thesaurus throat ever.”
Doctor: I can't treat you.
Orphan: Why!
Doctor: I'm a family doctor.
You're so skinny my grandma gonna use you like a cane.
What do Africans eat for breakfast?
E-bola Cornflakes.
The doctor told me my temperature was exactly 98.6 degrees. I felt relieved until he said, “Celsius.”
Leukophobic people don’t have sex. Leukophobia is the fear of white.
How can you tell that a woman cannot fit through a vent because she got pregnant from a baby elephant? Ain't no telling who's in better shape, the elephant or the woman. I guess it's probably Weight Watchers.
What's bad? A nut allergy.
What do you call a crappy circumcision?
A rip-off.
We can nip March Madness in the bud, but only if we detect the warning signs of brooding, anti-social February Fever.
What goes up but never past the digits 15?
A Make-A-Wish kid...