Health jokes
Me and my cancer
Are like a game of Fortnite.
I’ll never win.
Did you hear about the "Funny Doctor"?
He'll have you in "Stitches"!
If your girl smells like tilapia, don’t let her on top of ya.
My friend's emo. I told her to play jump rope with me. She hanged herself. Lol.
What do you give a pig when it has a rash?
Oinkment.
What is a lot?
Syphilis.
Why did the fish go to the doctor?
Because he was feeling “eel.”
Q: How many more chemo treatments did the cancer patient need?
A: Tumor.
Me and my wife decided we would only smoke after sex.
I'm still on the first pack. She's up to 2 packs a week.
Why is it you donate one kidney, you're a hero, but donate four or five and people run and call the police?
Roses are red, my mental health is blue, Karen got no mom like you.
Don’t worry if you have a stroke.
You’ll be all right.
What do you call an autistic daughter?
Dolls have wigs made of mohair, cancer patients have wigs of no hair.
What is the difference between eating a baby and a doughnut?
Babies are healthier.
I should probably stop making jokes about bulimia. They just leave a bad taste in my mouth.
"You is so black your mama fainted."
What's thick, long, hard, and has cum in it?
Cucumber. Lol. I love the way you think.
What's the difference between broccoli and a booger?
Kids won't eat broccoli.
Q: What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
A: Leukemia.