Health jokes
You're so skinny the world turns to the left!
Me in 2078 when the COVID-19 delta alpha theta beta cya layta alligayta nlgga chungus sussy deef clussy sussy bussy cunnybrap variant comes out and I need to stay in lockdown for another 2 years with my new mandated virus stopper buttplug 9000.
Yo momma so fat, when she went for a health consultation, the doc told her to make do with health insurance.
Why were condoms invented? So gay guys can have sword fights.
Fe fi foung better run and hide: Covid (really).
FRR
How do skeletons get COVID?
From the coffin!
Which is the best sport at making fat people lose weight?
Canned hunting.
When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."
Why didn't the teddy bear go to the gym?
Because he didn't want to get ripped.
My grandfather told me I'm too reliant on technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
Sometimes I wish I could use my school scissors on my heart.
What do you call a group of depressed people?
Suicide squad.
What is Stephen Hawking's best side?
The left.
What do queer guys call hemorrhoids? Speed bumps!
Why did I cross the road to might get hit by a car or a bus?
What do you call an overly clingy child?
A tumor.
What is black, white, and red all over? An interracial abort!
What do you call a food fight that's been going on for years?
A war of nutrition.
My family was like dinosaurs when they got COVID.
They both went extinct.
Why is 2020 the worst year? Because COVID-19!