Health jokes
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
Man, cancer is so easy to beat. I'm already on stage 4.
What did the deaf, dumb, and blind kid get for Christmas?
Answer: cancer.
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He's all right now.
Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
We finally have something in common with Africa. They die of starvation, we die of overeating.
What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.
None.
How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?
Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.
What did the terrorist do when his kidneys failed?
Dial-ISIS!
You guys, this is my last time publishing something here. You guys have been sending rude comments, and I need to work on my mental health. Goodbye.
I went to kill Biden with poison water and mixed it with my finger, and then licked it. I passed out, and now I'm here.
What do you get if you cross a loaf of bread with a vagina?
A yeast infection.
A 9-year-old girl lies on a hospital bed struggling to breathe as she waits for the doctor to come.
The doctor finally comes, and the little girl can breathe much easier after he pulls his cock out of her mouth.
How are this joke and the kid with cancer alike?
It never gets old.
Have you ever heard about the new virus in China? It's called Hupun.
Hupun DEEZ NUTS!
My friend's emo. I told her to play jump rope with me. She hanged herself. Lol.
What do you call a flat-chested depressed person?
A cutting board.
Jokes about menstruation are never funny, period!