My mom asked my doctor, "Why is my unvaccinated baby crying?"
The doctor replied, "He's going through a midlife crisis."
Health Jokes
Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He's all right now.
Which is faster, hot or cold?
Hot, because you can catch cold.
Why do hospitals have air conditioning?
To keep the vegetables cold and fresh.
What do you get if you cross a loaf of bread with a vagina?
A yeast infection.
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?
Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.
What's the difference between my ripped jeans and my arms?.
None.
You guys, this is my last time publishing something here. You guys have been sending rude comments, and I need to work on my mental health. Goodbye.
If you are dehydrated, you should get well soon.
Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he felt crummy!
Robert doesn’t see people, the man just sees meals.
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
Because he wasn't peeling very well!
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew.
What do you call a Muslim with Tourette’s? A ticcing time bomb.
The cancer patient asked the doctor how many more months he had to live. The doctor replied, "Tu-more."
When your girl is sucking your dick and chokes on it, not because it’s big but because you haven’t washed it in weeks.
If I ever stuff up a post, please let me be. I do have ADHD, short-term memory disorder, and dyscalculia, so please remember that no one likes to be picked on for things that they can't control.
Joe Biden doesn’t follow his own f**king mask mandate.
Your mom's so heavy that it caused Atlas, the Titan, to slip a disc.
