Health jokes
What do you get from childhood drama? A ginger with autism.
Why can’t kids with cancer have anal sex?
Because they have cancer.
Yo mama so fat, when she goes to the movies, she sneaks candy in her fat rolls.
Doctor: I'm sorry, but you still have 10 seconds left.
Man: What?! What about my family?! My son is still missing! I can't just leave like that!
Doctor: Don't worry sir, I told your family.
Man: That's... great... if they found my son, tell them that I love him more than anything and I couldn't keep that promise.
The doctor watches the man closing his eyes while tears fell down from his eyes.
Doctor: I will... dad...
Tq for reading my crappy joke.
How did the fat person cross the road?
It rolled.
The only doctor you have is Doctor Pepper.
What did the doctor say to the potato?
It told it it had tuberculosis.
What's the difference between my arm and legs? Nothing. I slit both of them.
What did the bird go to the hospital for?
For tweetment!
Q: What is the most expensive haircut? A: Chemo therapy.
I threw a lamp at a depressed kid. I was just trying to brighten up his day.
Why do women have periods?
Because they deserve them, haha!
Me: I have an arrow in my head.
My friend: What's the point of that?
Me: Of the arrow?
Friend: No!
Me: Probably the flint.
I told myself the other night after a long night at the bar that I should stop drinking.
But why should I listen to a drunk who talks to himself?
What day should you drink water?
Thursday, Thirstday!
I have cripple and depression.
What does a kid with cancer and a house fly have in common? A life expectancy of 15-25 days.
My brackets are so high on my teeth, they must be smoking something.
I went to the pharmacy the other day. I tried to buy a pack of condoms, but I pretended I didn't have enough money to mess with the cashier.
I went back into the aisles of the store, got a pack of rubber bands and plastic wrap, bought them, and walked out. I loved the look on the cashier's face when they saw my decision.
Cancer HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA