Health jokes

There are 206 bones in the human body.

207 when I'm at a nursery.

All countries will get Covid.

Except China, they got it right off the bat.

If laughter is contagious, LEO is immune.

What's the difference between me and cancer?

Well, my dad couldn't beat cancer.

What do you do when an epileptic has a seizure in the bathtub?

Throw in some laundry...

Why did Daveon go to the doctor?

Because he was feeling "Daveon" in the dumps.

My proctologist used to be a photographer. He took x-rays and told me to bend over and say "cheese!"

Why did the rapper go to the optometrist?

Because he needed to improve his RAP VISION.

What do you call a gender neutral person who is lactose intolerant non-bi dairy?

What do priests give children?

Syphilis.

What is faster, hot or cold?

Hot, because you can catch a cold.

What did the doctor say to the mother after delivering the baby? Sorry.

I bribbled a kid and he was bribbled hem so hard that his balls came off.

What's the difference between normal sex and anal sex?

One makes your whole day and one makes your hole weak.

Your hair is receding more than people do when they smell you.

What is big and long and hard?

A cucumber!

You're so fat, that you're fat.

The only doctor you have is Doctor Pepper.

How does a train sneeze?

It goes, "A-choo choo!"

What do you do if your dick is smoking?

Get your mum to lick it.