Why did the orphan play GTA? So he could get wanted.
Get Jokes
The Twin Towers should've known they were gonna get hit when their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"
Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.
Orphan: How come?
Me: You wouldn't get it.
Orphan: . . . .
Why couldn’t the orphan play baseball?
He couldn’t get to home base.
What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?
One gets picked.
If you have an emo kid army, they'll kill themselves before they get to the field.
Your mama's so fat when she sat on the toilet, the toilet said, "A, B, C, D, E, F, G, get your fat ass off of me!"
What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
Apples get picked.
What's a reversed exorcism?
It's when it's the demon who's telling the priest to get out of the child's body.
What do you get when you throw holy water on a cow?
A holy cow!
Why did the kid cry?
His dad didn't get the milk.
Man 1: Hey, I heard you survived a school shooting. What was it like?
Man 2: People were screaming and running everywhere. I was only able to get a few of them.
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his whopper.
There's an upside to being an orphan; every snack they get is family size.
Guys, say "I love gape horn" really loud and you will get good luck for 10 years.
My ex is like AIDS! I can't get rid of him.
My friends:
Maya: I only get 9 hours of sleep.
Josh: 9 hours? I get 7 hours of sleep.
Noah: You get 7? I get 4 hours of sleep.
Me: You guys are getting sleep...
What do you get if you cross a gorilla and a prisoner? A kong-vict.
I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm getting over it.
