Get jokes

Roses are red, Get on the ground, Gimme your stuff, Get ready to drown!

Dad: Son, do you want to play Rock 'Em Sock 'Em Robots?

Son: Sure, let me get it from the closet.

Dad: No, bring your sisters. Just like the game, they can’t move their legs.

What do you get when you cross a dick and a potato?

A dictator.

Why did the Emo Chicken cross the road?

To get hit by a car.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind, paraplegic, autistic baby get for Christmas? AIDs.

If an emo doesn't get better by Christmas, Santa's reindeer won't be the only thing jumping off roofs this year.

What do you get when you cross Bill Cosby and Jeffrey Epstein?

Predator 2.

I don’t get why Katniss was bitching so much in ‘The Hunger Games’ books. Ethiopia has been competing for years and I don’t hear any of them complaining.

What's the difference between an apple and an orphan?

One gets picked.

What’s the difference between an orphan and an apple?

One gets picked.

Why did the orphan play GTA? So he could get wanted.

I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.

My late grandpa was always popular with women. One day, before he died, I asked him what his secret was. He said, "I inherited a watering hole."

Bewildered, I replied, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I could easily get anyone wet because I was well endowed."

What does Michael Jackson and a TV have in common? They both get turned on by kids.

Why do prepubescent orphan girls love pedophiles? Because they get to call someone “Daddy”.

Me: Dark humor jokes are like a mother's love.

Orphan: How come?

Me: You wouldn't get it.

Orphan: . . . .

Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?

Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.

The Twin Towers should've known they were gonna get hit when their mom said, "Here comes the airplane!"

Why couldn’t the orphan play baseball?

He couldn’t get to home base.

What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?

One gets picked.