Fucking jokes
I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.
So I'm reading Hamlet, right? And then this one page they like, "Yo, like, Hamlet the fuck t tgo foff off KING speak, yo" 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂 truth ong fr 😂 Face with thing is funny or... 😂 😂 😂 😂 the
How do you recycle a condom? Turn it inside out and shake the f *ck out of it!
Hell you fuck, bitch, dick!
What does 6 tell 7?
"GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!"
Yo mama so fat.
In Super Mario Galaxy, she was a fucking planet!
Kylin fucks his sister.
Jacob likes fucking me and my mom.
Seeing so many balding college students is so sad. Like, why the fuck is your hairline graduating before you?!?
Isn't a gaming console something people use to not be alone?
THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE 50% OF THE GAMES OFFLINE?!??!?!
Whoever said men will f**k anything that moves is *dead* wrong.
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"
A man walks into his bedroom where his wife is carrying a sheep under her arm and says, "This is the pig I've been fucking."
Wife says, "That's not a pig; that's a sheep, dumbass."
Husband says, "I was talking to the sheep."
A farmer walks into his bedroom with his wife in bed with a sheep under his arm and says, "This is the pig I'm fucking." She says, "You idiot, that's a sheep!" He says, "Shut up, I wasn't talking to you."
Jordan, you stupid ass! Addison never bothered you so leave her the FUCK alone! How about this? Get up, go outside, stop being a jackass, and get a fucking life!
How can you tell that a blonde likes you? She only gives three fucking nights in a row.
I made an advent calendar for a Jehovah’s Witness.
Behind every door someone tells you to fuck off.
Quoting the great Jimmy Carr: "When I cook, I make sure there are vegetarian options. They can make do, or they can fuck off."
Job interview: "What's your greatest weakness?"
"Honesty."
"I don't think honesty is a weakness."
"I don't give a fuck what you think."
President Chumples memorialised Charlie Kirk by saying, "He had a real shot at being president."
That's not a joke. The fat fuck actually said that after pan face got shot.