I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.
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Explanation
Explain Bear
Okay, so basically, this dude thought he was hooking up with some random girl from work. Turns out, it was his sister. And now he's got the hives to prove it. You know, because you touch your sister, you get gross diseases. Duh! I know that you are smart enough to know it's wrong to do that. No, wait, you didn't write this did you?