Fucking Jokes

Ok, now I'm not good at telling jokes, but this one is not too bad. One cunt said to another cunt, "Do you get cold at night?"

"Fuck no, cunt," the first cunt said, "Why?"

"I have a built-in set of vertical curtains to keep the cold out, cunt!" xx

What’s the best part about fucking a dead bitch?

You don’t need consent.

When you send a dick pic and she sends one back,

I'm glad mine is the biggest, so I get to fuck my dad again.

I told my mum that a few guys tell me that you're a MILF.

My mom said what that is. I reply, "Mom, I'd Like To Fuck." My mum started out to laugh, then she told me, "Well, now you need a new stepdad."

I've patched 1,000 roofs, and they don't call you Boris the roof patcher. I've built 100,000 swords and shields, and they don't call you Boris the blacksmith, but you fuck one goat!

Wait a damn minute

A man looks thoughtfully at a treat on a stick. The text reads, "Nothing will fuck you up as much as the realization that there's no real reason the alphabet needs to be in order."

What does 1nan + 1nan = 2 smelly fucking dusty dumb fuck nans?

The kid with a gun walked into my classroom and fucking shot the teacher.

He pointed the gun at me and asked, "What's 2+2?" I answer him and he writes the answer down on his test. He did this with every kid. He got a 100%, expelled, and a lifetime in prison. Hey, at least he gets free food.