Friend jokes

I called my guy friend a cock-sucker the other day. He replied with, "Hey, 20 bucks is 20 bucks."

Alright, class, we have 39 students and 40 seats.

That one dyslexic kid thinking he’s Superman:

Thanks Ethan for all you've done. We've both made mistakes when all is said and done, but just thanks for being a good friend. This is officially my last post on here, Ethan-Real 1.

My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?

Why do girls only stay in odd groups of friends?

Because they literally can't even.

Little Jim's friend told him that if he farts, he will give him a tenner. Little Jim tries to fart, but he poos himself, and he is bullied until he puts the poo on the bullies' face.

How much context, pecker? You Press context categoria, go Discord.

Drink tea with friend game night.

I took my friend skydiving once, and he jumped out of the plane without a parachute. Then I remembered he was emo.

Confucius say: "Gay man who take far, far away trip, hates to leave friends behind."

My friend: I want to cut myself.

Me: No, don’t do that. *hands lighter* Do this instead.

Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?

Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!

Your hairline and forehead must be friends, because they go way back further than the universe.

Friend: You know how I like my women like my coffee... hot.

Me: What if you don't like coffee? :(

Three good friends decided to meet in their favorite caffe.

The meetup was a successful one, because they all enjoyed themselves.

My friend tried to sleep on napkins.

I guess that's why they're called NAP-kins.

Friend: Do you know him?

Other Friend: Know who?

Friend: My dick!

Last night I slipped on a banana.

My friend said it was a-peeling!

Me: No one likes Shrek; he is just a fat green guy.

Friend: Hey! Stop talking about me.

From the wise words of my friend, "You ain't a man 'til you had a man."

I can't believe my friends. They killed themselves without me!