Friend jokes
Yesterday I went to a party at my friend’s house. Everyone was dressed as birthday candles. It was a blowout.
Why does Johnny Sins cover his pants, but it doesn't work?
Because the long, hard thing can't chirp down.
Tell it to your parents and friends!
My orphan terrorist friend is on TV... I think he blew up.
Your hairline and forehead must be friends, because they go way back further than the universe.
Okay, what do you call that purple thing in your mom's top dresser drawer that she calls her best best friend for some weird reason?
Dad better look out from Bob, battery-operated boyfriend, hahaha!
My friend asked which is better to have, and you have to choose: autism or Down syndrome?
One of my friends got a haircut, and everyone giggled and bullied him... I didn’t, I died of laughter 😂
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
Yo mama so old, her photos are in a museum and her friends are in a graveyard.
Friend: Hi.
Me: Do you know how lost their dad is?
Friend: Me?
Me: Damn, no, not you.
Friend: Then who?
Me: The orphan kid.
I guess we're the same.
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?
The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
Jonny went fishing and he didn’t know how to cast his pole, and he asked his friend Joe how to cast it. Then when he cast, he only cast 3 feet, and he never learned how to do it.
Why does Struan smell so awful? Because he is friends with Jerp.
If y'all look up freshfry jokes, I'll come up. About a year ago, I had a bunch of friends on this app.
Why does an orphan like The Beatles? Because it's family friendly.
Why didn't the orphan play video games with his friends?
Because his parents wouldn't let him.
One day I went to talk to my friend.
"Hi John!" I said.
No response.
"Oh, yeah."
I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.
"Hope that helps!"
Boy: "Why can't you get a family?"
Me: "Why can't you get a rope?"
Boy: "What do you mean?"
Friend and me: "We can show you."
Me: "I will tie the rope."
Friend: "I will push the chair."
Me: Are you an alien?
Friend: No.
Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.
When I died, my friend said he'd cover me.