What do Michelangelo and Kurt Cobain have in common?
They both used their brains to paint the ceiling.
Why did the snail paint a big “S” on his car? Because he wanted people to say look at that S car go when he rolled by.
One time I saw a manatee all spray painted to look like a tiger. Needless to say, the first thing I yelled was, “OH! THE HUMANATEE!”
An artist is commissioned to create a painting celebrating Soviet-Polish friendship, to be called “Lenin in Poland.” When the painting is unveiled at the Kremlin, there is a gasp from the invited guests. The painting depicts Lenin’s wife naked in bed with Leon Trotsky.
“But this is a travesty! Where is Lenin?” Asks one of the guests.
“Lenin is in Poland,” replies the painter.
How to decorate a wall:
Strip of the paper and original plaster
put on fresh plaster and wall paper
paint it (if you want)
Send a bill to North America and wait patiently for a reply
A boat carrying red paint ando a boat carrying blue paint crashed into each other. The crews were marooned
Two kids walked into a bar, they were covered with blood. the bartender asked what happened. The youngest said “Well, we we’re trying to paint our basement but we threw the babies too hard”.
I asked my dad , Why did you paint rabbits on your bald head? He replied, Because I thought it would look like hares
What did the house painter ask when he went to the abortion clinic? Where do you keep the cans of paint?