Food jokes

Why can Chinese people play baseball?

Because they ate the bat.

Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.

Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.

My "choco" is too "late" for lunch.

Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?

You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.

What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?

I yam.

Why are they called s’mores?

Because you always want another one!

Vegetarian: I prefer plants.

Herbivore: I just like food.

Cannibal: I'm a people person.

What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?

Kentucky Fried Children!

What's it called when you eat those same babies?

Finger Lickin' Good!

I eat kids.

Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?

Why didn't the butcher cut the fillet?

Because it was a misteak.

Have you heard the latest pun about pizza?

Never mind. It’s too cheesy!

Why were the cherries 🍒 crying?

Because their parents were in a jam.

So I thought about trying to eat a clock one day.

After about 13 tries, I realized this was very time consuming.

Women have eggs and milk in them...

And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.

There was a person inside who needed help from the police, but the police changed their number, so he ordered a party with pizzas from 2 airplanes, but the pilots were stupid, so they put people instead of pizzas, and one landed on the 93rd floor and the 94th floor, literally.

Why'd Sally drop her ice cream?

She was hit by a bus.

What is the cheapest kind of meat?

Deer balls, two for under a buck!

Yo mama is so fat when she sees a bus full of white people, she thinks it's a Twinkie, lmao xd.

Knock knock.

Who’s there?

Ketchup.

Ketchup who?

Ketchup my slow tomatoes! 🍅😂