Food jokes
Q: How did Burger King get Dairy Quinn pregnant?
A: He forgot to wrap his whopper 🍆🍔.
I like my bread how I like my wife: cold and stiff.
What is black and white, black and white, black and white and green?
Three zebras fighting over a pickle.
What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish?
"This tastes a little funny."
Please help, my dad is an addict. He won't stop, and he eats my food.
Sometimes I think, should I kill him? But nah, he will go down with the others who did that too.
There are two muffins baking in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "Phew, is it getting hot in here or is it just me?"
The other muffin says, "AAAAHHH!! A TALKING MUFFIN!"
Q: What's a ship's least favorite food? A: Iceburg-ers
What is the difference between artificial vanilla and Marjorie Taylor Greene's children?
Artificial vanilla comes from a beaver's asshole, the children from an asshole's beaver.
Have you ever heard of emo pizza?
It cuts itself!
What is the difference between cum and milk? Nothing. They are both white and tasty.
What’s a similarity between a priest and McDonald’s?
They both shove their meat between 10 year old buns.
Why can Chinese people play baseball?
Because they ate the bat.
Is it weird that a milk carton has a date, and I don’t?
Why are they called s’mores?
Because you always want another one!
Vegetarian: I prefer plants.
Herbivore: I just like food.
Cannibal: I'm a people person.
What do you get when you throw a pile of dead babies into a fryer?
Kentucky Fried Children!
What's it called when you eat those same babies?
Finger Lickin' Good!
I eat kids.
Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?
You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.
Women have eggs and milk in them...
And they say that they don't belong in the kitchen.
What did the sweet potato say to the potato when he was told to hurry?
I yam.