Food jokes
Mom: Hey, there's IHOP.
Kid: You hop to.
What starts with a "v" and ends with a "k"? A veggie Karen.
How bad is explosive diarrhea when a Muslim has it? Because my Chipotle blew up yesterday.
You want to hear a cheesy pizza joke? Never mind, it's too cheesy!
Hehehehehe.
What do an orphan and an apple not have in common?
The apple actually gets picked.
Beans
What do you do when a Panera Bread panera breads?
Panera Bread.
What do you call a hospital that's flooded with vegetable soup?
What did the French Fry 🍟 say to the Hamburger 🍔?
I guess that’s a wrap!
Chinese takeout $15.00, gas to get there $1.50. Getting home to find they've forgotten one of your dishes... rice-less!
Q: Where do smart hot dogs end up?
A: The honor roll.
What do you call a white man having intercourse with a black woman?
An Oreo.
Life is like a box of chocolates. It doesn’t last as long for fat people.
Why did the vegetable cross the road? He didn't, he just sat there.
What's the difference between jam and jelly?
You can't jelly your cock into a girl's mouth.
A slag is like the first piece of bread in a loaf. Everyone touches it, but nobody wants it.
Your mama can't walk up the stairs because she eats too much chips.
A husband comes home from work one day, and his wife is watching the Food Network. The husband asks, "Why do you watch that? You still can’t cook," and the wife responds, "Why do you watch porn? You still can’t fuck."
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to go to KFC.
"Pizza place, pizza place, are you there?"
"You're ass heck bye."