What do you call a restaurant that sells food that contains weed?
McBongald's.
What do you call a sheep covered in chocolate?
A candy baa.
Where do the Borg eat fast food?
Borger King.
Why was the DJ banned from the supermarket?
He was stealing all the samples.
Why did the strawberry cry? -- Because his mother was in a jam.
What do you do with epileptic lettuce? -- You make a seizure salad.
I had to clean out my spice rack and found everything was too old and had to be thrown out. What a waste of thyme.
What do cows eat for breakfast? -- Moosli.
What do you call a cow with two legs?
Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef.
Why did the tomato blush? -- Because it saw the salad dressing.
Where do rabbits eat breakfast?
IHOP.
Where do you learn to make ice cream? -- Sundae school.
Two horses are standing in a field. "I'm so hungry I could eat a horse," says the first.
"Moo!" says the second.
What did music tell the pancakes? -- B flat.
What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky.
What do vegetarian zombies eat?
Graaaaiins.
Where can you find some of the world's largest vegetables? -- In an American nursing home.
What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? -- The wheelchair.
Why can't you starve in the desert?
Because of all the sand which is there.
My boyfriend came over today and stole my milk. How dairy!
