I was going to an expensive dinner with my friend's girlfriend because she really wanted to go, but he just got out of surgery, and he said take care of her, so I said, "Will do, bro. I’ll bring her back fuller than a topped-up water bottle."
Topped Up
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Explain Bear
Alright listen up, buttercup. So, the dude's buddy just had surgery, right? And he's all like, "Take care of my girl." But this jokester? He's implying he's gonna bang his buddy's girlfriend and fill her up like a water bottle. See, it's funny because it's messed up. And you, my friend, probably thought they were just going to have a nice chat.