Finance jokes

Are you free tomorrow?

No, I’m expensive, sorry. 💵💸

What do you call an emo hosting a charity event?

Fund razor.

Why did the orphan play Monopoly? To at least get some money. #fake

Why did the man laugh when he only had just one nickel and one penny in his pocket?

He had a 6 cents of humor.

The orphan had to earn money because he/she didn't have parents to give him/her an allowance.

My job is so amazing.

Today a man asked me to check his balance, so I pushed him over. His balance isn't good.

For every dollar a man makes, a woman makes 70 cents.

That’s unfair! Now the man only has 30 cents!

Your teeth are sponsored by gap.

Daddy, good morning, please, I want too, but Davido's second-hand towel is 2.5 million.

How to make the kissing in a tree recognizable: me and you k.i.s.s.i.n.g., tree sitting, wedding, love, then comes love, then comes baby in the carriage, then hate comes, divorce and purse.

FEW!!!!!!!

What's the difference between a government and a pawn shop?

They lower you.

I like men like I like money, always getting lost under my bed.

I get paid more than $200 to $400 per hour for working online. I heard about this job 3 months ago, and after joining this, I have earned easily $30k from this without having online working skills. Simply give it a shot on the accompanying site...

Here is I started.............>> fixpay1.blogspot.com

My grandpa is an asshole. The fucker deserved to die. The son of a bitch was using his life support, and I needed to change my iPhone.

Yo mama so dumb she bought a toolkit to open up a Roth IRA.

Money, money, green, green. Money is all I need, need.

How does a pimp answer when asked why he chose his occupation?

Answer: He wanted a stable source of income.

How many Bay Street bankers does it take to change a light bulb?

In Toronto? One to hold it up and expect the entire country to revolve around them.

What's a Jew's worst nightmare?

A frozen bank account.

How many bankers does it take to change a light bulb?

Four—one to hold the bulb and three to try to remember the combination.