Finance jokes
What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?
Someone who COUNTS BARS all day!
If brains were taxed, Slade would get a rebate.
They say the only curves Daveon likes are on his credit card statements.
What did the tree do when the bank closed?
It started its own branch.
Your hairline is like the economy, it's going down.
Memes
I need to borrow 80 bucks from someone
Do you know why people in wheelchairs don’t pay for them?
Because they have to pay for road tax.
I lost my job at the bank. Some lady asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her.
I got my job at a bank and lost the job the day I got it. A lady asked me to check her balance... so I pushed her!
Why are hindustan bhai so good at Python?
When they are hungry, they use Python and take credit card information ;). You know what they say, you give a man a curry and he eats for a day, you give a man a language and he eats for a lifetime.
What has a tail, a head, but no body?
A coin.
In an alternate universe: I don't know how to solve the power of 10, but I do know how to pay taxes.
I held on to my money stronger than an orphan holds on to a teddy bear on Father's Day.
I don't got free candy. It costs child support.
Your mama is so ugly that when she walked in the bank, they had to turn off the cameras.
One day my mom told me not to be an actor. I said, "But mommy, I will make a lot of money!"
STORY OF 2 PEOPLE NOT ME:
Girlfriend: What would you do if I won the lottery?
Boyfriend: I would take half and leave you.
Girlfriend: Ok cool. I won 12 dollars here's 6 and don't come back.
Why did the orphan go to rob the bank? Because he wanted to be wanted! >:D
"Why are all these orphans here?" said Chris.
"Because their dad went to go get the milk," said MrBeast.
3 Years Later,
"I AM GIVING APPLE IN A SHARE TO EVERY ORPHAN IN THE WORLD, AND I'M ALSO GIVING EACH OF THEM 1000000000000 DOLLARS."
Why you should never borrow money from dwarves?
Because they are always short! 😁😁😁😁
What do orphans get when they go to a bank alone?