Business jokes
What do you call a private nun?
Nun-o-yo-business.
But he could only get 1 trade.
Why can’t orphans build anything?
Because they can’t go to Home Depot.
Why did Sellwood get named?
It is made of wood that got sold.
Why did the rapper open a bakery?
Because he wanted to make dough.
Did you know there’s a sex position called “Amazon”? You wait all day and nobody comes.
Why did the gym close?
It's because it just never worked out.
A horse walked in a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?"
Ads? More like bads.
Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on his side, there was a KFC shop.
I am starting a business where I help people count. It is called making the little things count.
Why was the rapper so good at math?
Because he could count bars like NOBODY’S BUSINESS!
A man comes to an assassin who charges $1000 per shot. He tells the assassin, "My wife's been cheating on me. I want you to shoot her in the head and shoot the guy in the dick." When they arrive, they wait. The man asks why he hasn't taken the shot. The assassin says, "I know how I can save you $1000."
You can't send an Indian to walk a corner. The only corner they will get to is 7-11.
Do they call it rapeseed oil because it is lube?
Why do orphans prefer IKEA to the Home Depot?
Because the Home Depot provides supplies for *a* home. IKEA just provides furniture.
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?
They're the ones that make the toys.
Q: What do you call a security guard at Samsung?
A: Guardians of the Galaxy.
Why don't Pakis play football? Every time they get a corner, they build a shop.
Welcome to Joe's pizza, you make 'em, we bake 'em.