watching 50 shades of grey was more painful then my uncle fisting me as a kid.
dankmemester
what do you call a lazy gay? someone who comes straight out of the closet,and goes straight to the couch.
there are 6 kinds of vitamins.wanna know how the 6th vitamin was made,just ask the ku klux klan they will tell you.
What looks like peanut butter and jelly,and makes a woman scream? Afterbirth
what’s the difference between grandma getting ran over by a reindeer,and a poor kids parents getting ran over by military tractors?When grandma got ran over by a reindeer,the kids actually gave a shit.
my grandpa is an asshole,the fucker deserved to die,the son of a bitch was using his life support,and i needed to change my iphone.
so i was sitting on the couch with a woman,and i asked her,does this napkin smell like chloroform?
2 gay kids made their version of the jack,and jill nursery rhyme. jack and jill went up the hill to fetch a pair of latte's.
What do you call a bunch of bi-racial retarded kids?Mixed vegetables.
my dick is like the way home for an orphan,its length is never-ending
What's the difference between eggs, and you? Eggs get laid, you don't.
why was the T-rex so angry?You would be angry too,if you’re arms were to short to masterbaute.
what does a husband of a woman do when he is horny.he goes on a buisness trip with 100 1 dollar bills
why are cripples offensive to patriots?because they can't stand for the pledge of allegiance.
what did the pimp order at the chinese resturaunt?He ordered some cock-bang-ho
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a hot tub? steamed vegetables.
i like my woman like i like my coffee in a big sack on top of donkey
what do you call a bunch of retarded kids in a swimming pool? vegetable soup.